Asking people for things?

I know that people say that it's rude to ask them to give you things in some cases like 'asking people for one of thier candys, a cup of coffee or food' instead of waiting for them to offer.


I also know that people often suggest that I should help myself in some circumstances, and that I shouldn't keep asking them for things because they think that I am lazy.





But now, not only was I told that I was lazy for asking them all the time, they later got annoyed because I wasn't asking other people for thier drinks and assuming that I can make it myself.





I am getting very angry, I just wanna be left alone!





I have tried everything to work out a way that most people can agree on and I have tried to chop and change it for different people, but I ended asking the wrong people and offending them and getting into arguements, and because I just wanna say to myself "You can't always please everyone", the fact that they won't lay off and let me is driving me near to punching their head in!

Asking people for things?
I think it's polite to always ask if you may have something. Only when you are very sure about the person, and the fact that they would really just prefer you to help yourself, should you help yourself.





It can be annoying not knowing what's right.





I know for me, when I'm the host, I don't mind people asking if they can have something to drink, or eat, because I should be offering it to them anyways. It's the polite thing to do.





However, when we are just out somewhere eating lunch, or something, I don't always appreciate people asking if they can have some of my food, or candy, or whatever, when I don't know them very well. If I would not feel comfortable asking them for something in return, I may not like it when they ask, especially if it happens often. There has to be a reciprocity to the relationship, or else I get irritated.





So, to cut it short:


1. Asking the host for something to eat/drink is Ok. If you know them well enough, and they've told you not to ask, then just help yourself.


2. If you are out in public, don't ask if you can have something, and don't help yourself, unless you feel comfortable enough with the person that you'd be willing to share in return.
Reply:what the f?
Reply:well it seems liek maybe u should always bring your own drinks or foods with you because, your right, you can't always please everyone and if you try your gonna end up insane. try apologizing to the peole that you got into a fight with even if u don't think they deserve an apology. expain to them your problem and they should understand.





good luck